Mind fuck

There are days when I’m strong, happy even
I tell myself the three year fever has passed and I’m free
It lasts for four days or so and you’re nothing but a passing through for me
A past thought for me.
I walk with that spring in my step
And suddenly I stop, falter, trip headlong into a realization
You’re still in my skin and the lie was only to get me through the first half of the week
The depression to sink me through the weekend
Mooning to control my mind, you to fuck me five ways into hell
In the most sick mind fuck
Drowning in myself.

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